Focusing…

IMG_20170103_122404Friday, March 10, 2017

I’m finding it harder to function lately. I live on autopilot. When I have work, I’m on time. Interactions with family and the children I take care of are what I live for.

In my necessary alone time, I often find myself feeling… dissatisfied. I’m lethargic, too, a lot of the time. I’ve been told that it could be because I don’t really do anything anymore; I used to have such a busy and demanding life with clearly defined goals, so maybe my body thinks I’m saving up energy for something. I’ve also been told that it could just be my period.

Waiting isn’t really a thing I can get around, no matter what a waste of time it feels like. I should be filling all of these long waits productively, but I feel uninspired or overwhelmed so much of the time.

Right now, my best is tweeting about music and politics and the black community, or blogging about life while listening to Scott Quinn over and over again.

If I don’t hurry up and face my fear, this could be what the rest of my life looks like, huh?

Today’s focus will be on writing a proposal and an e-mail. I’ll get just a little closer to my purpose today because I don’t think I will be okay if I still feel this way in five years.

8:10 AM (Daylight savings is on Sunday)

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